Well, I’m not the only one you know… says my computer prince. What do you mean by that, I ask. Well.. I heard a story that is similar to mine, he says. I know I’m supposed to ask in which story we’ve landed now, but I decide to be lazy and respond with a ohhhw and wait for him to tell it anyway.
If you are in a relationship for a longer period, you get used to patterns of communication. Predictability is part of that. That could be seen as boring, but it can also be very funny.
There’s a difference between men and women, but also in alpha and beta types. In our relationship we have the alpha female/beta male types. A creative talkative creature like me, with a scientific thinking brain like him. That’s bound to give some funny conversations from time to time.
What is this thing with alpha and beta?
Funny, strong, independent, and comfortable in her own skin, the Alpha believes in herself—but has some blind spots. She assumes that as an Alpha female she should be partnered with an Alpha male. The problem is, two Alphas will tend to compete for power and dominance.
In the past the idea was that an alpha female/male relationship should be successful, I’ve got news. Recently it’s been discovered that the beta man is hot. They are no longer called softies. This man is known as the ideal lover because of his attention for women’s needs.
Alpha ladies like to be in control, beta men don’t mind following. This may work fine, as long as there is mutual respect.
In the ’80 and ’90 the beta man was the sensitive guy who did his best to get in the feminist good book and was often mistaken for being gay, because he liked taking yoga classes. The transformed version is the reliable, responsible and supportive guy who doesn’t use the ego to get women to like him.
I always thought that I should have a like minded know it all for a partner. I can tell you, that didn’t work. It was a matter of time before the ego wrestling started. The idea of a less assertive partner wasn’t planned by me. It seems to take some time before one gets smart in life, so it took me a while. I was making lists of all his flaws when I first started dating a beta man. .
The thing that irritated me most, was the fact that he had the ability to accept me completely with all my flaws. How does he do that? He must be some special man! After some soul searching I finally started accepting him and even came to appreciate all the things on the list I had in the beginning. .
A beta man, yes.. he has potential ladies! A relationship requires work. So if you are alpha, beta or omega, you will have to get to work anyway. But for those of you who enjoy testing yourself…
