People respond much better to positive feedback. There a many books written and workshops developed about giving feedback. I often use the joke.. May I offer you a sandwich.. ?
For example: “I look at you and i see that you have such a natural way with people. People seem to lighten up when you’re around. That makes me happy.” (first layer of the feedback sandwich.. positive)
“And sometimes I see that you forget to ask people if they need groceries. That’s a pity, because if they want to make a sandwich, they might be out of butter.. I know I get grumpy if I don’t have my sandwich with butter and sprinkles in the morning.. Maybe you could make a check list or make one with the people”. (second layer of the feedback with a suggestion included).
“But boy.. you sure are passionate in your work.., I admire you for that” (third layer of the feedback positive)
It’s tricky… having an opinion about someone and telling them about it. You can’t predict how someone will get the message. I am no saint either 🙂 I know I can get irritated if someone wants to make a point and uses a summery of all the things I did wrong in their opinion. It’s like eating liver!
If someone wants to give feedback, there must have been something that bothered them. The purpose is to make me understand that. That will not happen if they make me eat liver first.
If you feed me a sandwich i think i might even thank you for the feedback and our relationship will be the same or even better.
Yesterday I got a huge compliment… That is nice every once in a while 🙂 To know you are appreciated for what you do or for who you are.
Let’s invite each other for a pick nick if something is bothering us.. Bon appetit!
